The Morning Sixpack - January 22, 2025
Trump's gone bat shitty crazier. What the hell is new?
Trump Administration Suspends Federal DEI Staff Amid Program Rollback
The Trump administration has ordered federal agencies to place diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) employees on paid leave by Wednesday at 5 p.m., signaling a sweeping rollback of Biden-era initiatives. Agencies have been directed to develop a "reduction-in-force action" targeting DEI staff, following executive orders aimed at dismantling diversity programs within the federal government.
Employees will retain full pay and benefits but will lose email access and be relieved of their duties. What the hell does this mean? Forever? Can I get hired now?
President Trump’s “Presidential Action” (formerly called an Executive Order), titled "Ending Radical and Wasteful Government DEI Programs and Preferencing," claims that former President Joe Biden's policies encouraged discrimination "in virtually all aspects of the federal government."
The Biden administration had previously mandated federal agencies to implement DEI hiring and promotion plans, emphasizing progress tracking. Agencies are now required to inform affected employees, remove DEI materials, and ensure no efforts are made to rebrand such programs using "coded or imprecise language." According to a memo from the U.S. Office of Personnel Management (OPM), first reported by CBS News, agencies must report compliance by Thursday noon.
"These programs divided Americans by race, wasted taxpayer dollars, and resulted in shameful discrimination," the OPM memo stated in a suggested email template for affected staff. Moving forward, agencies must submit a DEI workforce reduction plan by January 31. Additionally, the Justice Department has 120 days to recommend measures for curbing DEI initiatives within private sector companies and educational institutions receiving federal funds.
Despite the executive orders, the policy changes do not restrict college educators from advocating for DEI principles.
Source: MDGN
Flooding the Zone with Bullshit: A Bevy of “Presidential Actions” Taint Trump’s Return
Within hours of being sworn in, President Donald J. Trump hit the ground running, signing over 200 executive actions (or the more Orwellian “Presidential Actions” as this administration is calling them) in a bold effort to fulfill his campaign promises.
From slashing energy costs to mass deportations and ending birthright citizenship, his administration is making swift and controversial moves. "There's been a deluge of actions, orders, and pronouncements during the President's first day," NPR reports, emphasizing the breadth and speed of the changes.
The scope of Trump's executive orders spans multiple sectors, including imposing new tariffs, overhauling immigration policies, and granting pardons to individuals involved in the January 6th Capitol riot. The rapid rollout signals his intent to reshape the nation's policies without waiting for Congress, a strategy that mirrors his first term but with even greater urgency. Critics argue that such aggressive action could face significant legal challenges, while supporters see it as a long-overdue commitment to his base.
As the administration pushes forward, the implications of these executive actions will unfold in the coming weeks. Whether they withstand judicial scrutiny or face fierce opposition, Trump's approach underscores his determination to redefine America's trajectory.
Source: NPR
Trump’s ‘Fuck It’ Moment: Blanket Pardons for Jan. 6 Felons
In a move that can only be described as vintage Trump, the former president decided to grant a sweeping, unconditional pardon to approximately 1,500 individuals charged in connection with the January 6th attempted overthrow of the United States government.
According to insiders, Trump’s decision boiled down to his trademark approach: Rip the bandage off and move on.
"F--k it: Release 'em all," he reportedly declared, opting for mass clemency over a painstaking case-by-case review. While his MAGA base cheered the move as a fulfillment of a campaign promise, Republicans in Congress were left wincing at the optics of condoning violence against law enforcement.
This is the ONLY reason anybody should need to vote all these motherfucking Republicans OUT in 2026.
The behind-the-scenes drama reveals a last-minute scramble within Trump's team, with Vice President JD Vance initially suggesting a more cautious approach—before ultimately backing Trump's all-in strategy (because he’s the ultimate cuck).
Despite earlier statements claiming that those who assaulted police should not be pardoned, Vance reportedly fell in line, later reminding critics that he'd been supporting the so-called "J6 political prisoners" since 2021.
Meanwhile, Trump's advisers downplayed concerns about political fallout, insisting that voters have moved on to other issues and that "all the prosecutions are tainted."
Trump is a traitor. Full stop.
Source: Axios
Trump's Fast-Track Deportation Blitz: What It Means for Undocumented Immigrants
In a dramatic expansion of immigration enforcement, the Trump administration has granted Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) officers sweeping new powers to swiftly deport undocumented immigrants across the entire U.S.
Previously reserved for border areas, these expedited removal powers will now allow ICE to bypass the courts and deport individuals who can't prove they've been in the country for over two years.
According to the Department of Homeland Security, the move will "enhance national security and public safety while reducing government costs—by facilitating prompt immigration determinations."
Critics, however, argue it’s a backdoor tactic to carry out mass deportations without due process. So much for “law & order!”
This policy revival, spearheaded by Acting Homeland Security Secretary Benjamine C. Huffman, echoes Trump's first-term efforts, which faced legal pushback and were later scrapped by the Biden administration.
Experts say the fast-tracked removals could dramatically increase deportation numbers, with former ICE official Corey Price predicting agents will "lean into this heavily."
But immigration advocates are already gearing up for another legal battle, warning that the policy denies immigrants their right to a fair hearing and could lead to wrongful removals.
Opposition from advocacy groups has been swift and fierce.
Lindsay Toczylowski, president of the Immigrant Defenders Law Center, slammed the policy, stating, “Expedited removal is a deeply flawed practice that often denies immigrants a fair opportunity to access relief, separates families unnecessarily, and makes a mockery of the right to access counsel.”
With more than three million cases already clogging the immigration courts, Trump’s strategy aims to sidestep the backlog—and the law. By law, I mean the US Constitution (due process). But whatevs, y’all got what you wanted: Grievance and hate. Sorry your eggs cost too much.
Source: NYT
Trump Pardoned Silk Road Kingpin Ross Ulbricht
Trump has pardoned Ross Ulbricht, the dark web kingpin behind Silk Road—the Amazon of illicit substances.
This pardon isn’t exactly a shocker; Trump had been teasing it for months while cozying up to crypto donors who happily funneled over $100 million into his campaign.
“I just called the mother of Ross William Ulbright (sic) to let her know,” Trump posted on Truth Social, managing to botch Ulbricht’s name while simultaneously dunking on the prosecutors who put him behind bars, calling them “the scum that worked to convict him.”
Stay classy, Mr. President.
Ulbricht, the so-called “Dread Pirate Roberts,” was nabbed in 2013 at a San Francisco library (because nothing screams criminal mastermind like public Wi-Fi) and sentenced to two life terms plus 40 years for running an online drug empire that raked in over $200 million.
Prosecutors painted him as the “kingpin of a worldwide digital drug-trafficking enterprise,” complete with allegations of attempted murder-for-hire—though, in true crime-thriller fashion, no actual evidence of any hits ever surfaced. Despite this, his supporters argue the sentence was way too harsh and have been chanting “Free Ross” at Bitcoin conferences ever since.
While crypto fanatics are popping champagne, not everyone’s thrilled.
Law enforcement officials see this as a slap in the face to their efforts to crack down on online crime, and some folks remember that, oh yeah, drugs sold on Silk Road were linked to multiple deaths.
But hey, Trump knows how to play to his audience, and this move keeps his libertarian and crypto fanbase fired up.
Whether it's a bold stand for freedom or just another headline-grabbing stunt, one thing’s for sure—Ulbricht’s walking free, and the internet has thoughts.
Source: NYT
Read all about Silk Road here.
Musk’s ‘Salute’ at Trump Rally Sparks Nazi Comparisons—And His Excuse? Classic Cringe
Elon Musk, the self-proclaimed genius of everything, is back in the headlines—this time for a one-armed gesture at a Trump rally that had the internet screaming “Nazi salute.”
While addressing the crowd at Washington D.C.'s Capital One Arena, Musk dramatically placed his hand over his heart, then shot it straight out in front of him like he was auditioning for a historical reenactment no one asked for.
Social media exploded, with historians and regular folks alike calling it exactly what it looked like—a bad take on the “sieg heil.”
But in typical Musk fashion, he jumped on X (formerly Twitter) to brush it off, whining, “Frankly, they need better dirty tricks. The 'everyone is Hitler' attack is sooo tired."
Sure, Leon, everyone’s just out to get you.
Historians weren't buying it, with NYU professor Ruth Ben-Ghiat calling it “a very belligerent Nazi salute,” while Musk's buddy Andrea Stroppa—who's apparently an expert on everything Musk does—claimed it was just Elon “expressing his feelings” because of his autism. Yeah, people with autism are known to be raving Nazis. Not.
That take didn't age well, especially after Stroppa deleted his post that originally celebrated the move as a “Roman salute.”
Even the Anti-Defamation League awkwardly stepped in, suggesting Musk’s salute was just an “awkward gesture,” because apparently billionaires get the benefit of the doubt when they flail their arms around in weird ways.
Musk, who’s been cozying up to far-right parties in Germany and the UK, continues to dig himself deeper into a political pit that even his fanboys might struggle to defend.
Whether it was a cringe-worthy attempt at rally enthusiasm or just another episode of Musk being Musk, one thing is clear—he’s really leaning into that whole “misunderstood genius” schtick, and it’s getting old.
Source: BBC