Trump’s Cabinet Is Already Daydreaming About His Funeral March

Behind the praise parade, insiders whisper about failing health, heart pumps, and the next MAGA kingpin. #ETTD

TRuMp Is mISSiNg fInGeRS!

You know things are bad when Trump’s own Cabinet is practicing their “Hail to the Chief” struts without him. According to political consultant Rick Wilson (author of Everything Trump Touches Dies), White House insiders are already playing the “what happens when he’s gone” game—and it’s less about national stability and more about who gets the keys to the grift machine.

CNN exile Jim Acosta hosted Wilson and podcaster Molly Jong-Fast on The Jim Acosta Show, where the trio dissected a recent Cabinet meeting that looked less like governing and more like a hostage video. Officials lined up to shower Trump with over-the-top praise. The New York Times described it as a glimpse into how Trump “runs” the presidency.

Wilson, ever the cynic, said the real purpose was cheerleading—trying to lift Trump’s sagging spirits as reports swirl about his health. We’re talking mysterious bruises, swollen ankles, and whispers of age-related cardiac issues. Not exactly the “very stable genius” image the guy loves to project.

Wilson dropped the kicker: Doctors he’s spoken with think Trump may be staring down the barrel of a heart pump or even a transplant. That’s the kind of procedure that makes you ask—do you really put a 79-year-old under general anesthesia for a new ticker? Molly Jong-Fast voiced the same skepticism on air. Translation: The odds aren’t great, folks.

But the vultures aren’t waiting for the body to cool. Wilson pointed to that photo-op of JD Vance, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, and MAGA Rasputin Stephen Miller striding through Union Station. That would’ve been Trump’s role once upon a time. Now? They’re rehearsing for the post-Trump era, testing how they’d look in charge.

The message is clear: Succession planning has already begun, just not in public.

And let’s be blunt—the Trump dynasty isn’t about policy; it’s about profit. Wilson warned that if Vance or anyone else takes the wheel, the Trump family will come after them knives-out.

Why? Because the grift must go on. From crypto schemes to shady “advisory roles” at U.S. companies desperate for access, the Trump machine is a multibillion-dollar hustle. And no one—not even a loyal lapdog—gets between the family and its cash flow.

Names like Marco Rubio keep floating as possible heirs. Acosta noted Rubio’s “pick me” behavior, bending over backward to please MAGA overlords.

Wilson shut that down fast: “They’re never going back to Marco.” Why would they? The second anyone threatens the money pipeline, they’re finished. Better to keep it in the family. Eric, Don Jr., even Ivanka if she can stand being near the clown car again. Wilson even suggested Don Jr. could snag the GOP nomination if Trump keels over. He’s popular with the base, he can shout “Biden crime family!” with the best of them, and in a crowded field, that’s all it takes.

The bigger picture? This isn’t about governance—it’s about power as a family business. The MAGA movement isn’t prepping policy white papers. They’re figuring out which Trump kid gets to eat the golden goose (“They’re eating the dogs. They’re eating the cats!”) and how to keep the rubes donating.

Health concerns aside, Trump’s grip is slipping, and his circle is already calculating how to out-Trump Trump without losing the grift.

Source: AlterNet

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Funny how the “party of strength” is led by a guy who can’t walk across a room without looking like he’s auditioning for Weekend at Bernie’s. And yet, millions will still chant his name like he’s a demigod. Maybe the GOP should just change its mascot to a vulture—it’s more accurate.